Published January 2016
Depression, in my experience, seems to be sadly misunderstood for both the individual that is suffering, and for the loved ones who are trying their best to help and support.
The education on this illness is more elusive than the Scarlett Pimpernel!
At the time of my depressive illness, I didn’t understand was happening to me. I lived a busy life, I had faced challenging times, but I thought I was coping and doing ok in general. The symptoms of depression hit me quite unexpectedly. And try as I might to remain positive, doing my best to help myself, my mental health deteriorated into a very painful place and I didn’t know why? Mind over matter did not work, and I couldn’t ‘make myself’ feel any better even though I tried. Something within me was simply not working anymore.
I didn’t really understand any of it, until I was in the middle of my second episode of depressive illness. One evening at home, I was on the Amazon website, putting ‘Depression Self Help’ into the search bar hoping for a miracle cure, and scrolling down the pages, when a title of a book jumped out at me! The title of this book was called:
‘Depressive Illness – The Curse of The Strong’
By Dr Tim Cantopher (Psychiatrist AKA Brain Doctor!)
The reason why this title jumped out at me is that when you are in depression, you feel worthless, hopeless, guilty, tired, weak; at no stage do you feel ‘strong’ and yet here was a book telling me that it was a curse of the strong! So I read the product description, then I read the reviews, and it was the reviews that sold this book to me!
There are hundreds of reviews but I have singled out this review (abridged) to share with you:
‘This book is the single most informative, eye opening and revealing information I have ever read about depression. This information Dr Cantopher provides should be taught in senior schools and within medical professions. Some GPs really need to read this book. Understanding the illness is the only way to accept it, learn and move forward. Depression is a physical illness… YES a physical illness. “It is every bit as physical as pneumonia or a broken leg” Once you have read this book you will agree that Depression is a stupid name for this debilitating illness, it really should be called Limbic Disorder. If you are suffering from depression, don’t just read the book, pass it round your friends and family and ask them to read it too.
And so I brought the book! I didn’t opt for the kindle version; I ordered a good old fashioned paper-back book which arrived in the post a few days later.
In the opening paragraph of ‘Depressive Illness, The Curse of the Strong’ by Dr Tim Cantopher, Consultant Psychiatrist, he describes depressive illness as a physical illness. Physical in the sense that it’s a condition in the brain, the same way that there could be a condition of the heart, condition of the lungs, or even having a broken bone. He describes it, in simple terms “A real an illness as to any other organ in the body, as physical a condition as pneumonia, or a broken leg”
He also says very early on in his book, and it’s the one statement that kept me with the book: ‘If you are in the middle of a severe depressive illness, you won’t be able to concentrate for long. Don’t try to read more than a page or two at a time. Concentrate on Chapters 1 and 5 for now. You can read the rest when you’re a bit better and can concentrate for longer’ This was what I was waiting to hear, and I didn’t even know it until I read it!
The Limbic System
One set of structures that we have in the brain is called the limbic system. The limbic system controls a lot of the body’s processes, such as sleeping-waking cycles, temperature control, temper control, eating patterns and hormones; every hormone in the body is directly or indirectly under the control of the limbic system. It keeps all of these functions in balance with each other.
Dr Tim Cantopher likens it to the body’s ‘mood thermostat’ which controls vitality, sleep, appetite, mood, concentration, memory.
The limbic system is made up of nerve pathways which ‘talk to each other’ and transmitter chemicals connect these nerve pathways together. In clinical depression it is these transmitter chemicals which are affected, namely Serotonin, Noradrenaline, and Dopamine.
If we are under constant and prolonged ‘stress’, pushing ourselves beyond our limits continually, we end up using our stores of transmitter chemicals far quicker than we can replace them, eventually causing a complete depletion. This loss of transmitter chemicals causes the limbic system to malfunction; the nerve pathways are unable to ‘talk to each other’ which create a set of insidious symptoms that define clinical depression.
The limbic system needs to heal, which can only happen when the transmitter chemicals serotonin, noradrenaline, dopamine, rebuilds its ‘stores’, so the nerve pathways can talk to each other again.
Recovery
The part where I, and I’m sure others, have made mistakes, is that we try to get ourselves out of this illness by trying very hard, doing too much, just to try and make ourselves feel ‘normal again!’ The reality is we are actually doing more damage, as we rapidly use up the transmitter chemicals that are slowing ‘drip feeding’ back into the stores. Without these transmitter chemicals, the nerve pathways still can’t talk to each other, and we remain in depressive illness. The limbic system needs to heal. Time is needed for our transmitter chemicals to regenerate.
If we had a broken bone, we all understand that it will take time (and a plastercast) to heal. The limbic system is no different.
When the limbic system begins to heal, the transmitter chemicals regenerating enough to allow the nerve pathways of our limbic system to talk to each other one again, the symptoms of clinical depression will fade which results in our good health returning. And if we keep our transmitter chemical levels as they should be, we will remain healthy and well.
This is the limbic system explained as simply as I needed to understand at the time of being ill. . When my concentration levels were low (sometimes non-existent) this simple explanation of the limbic system, and it’s nerve pathways and lack of transmitter chemicals, was sufficient information to give me the answer I was looking for, it told me why I was ill! It helped me to understand what I could do (and not do!) in order to get better.
But how can we ensure that we keep our transmitter chemicals at the correct levels? How can we measure these levels, when they are not visible? I won’t lie when I say that I am ever learning on this front. The biggest lesson surviving a depressive illness has taught me, is that I need to pace myself better and I need to slow down! Specifically, I need to do one thing at a time, not a hundred things.
I was once told by a lovely wise lady ‘your mind races faster than your body’ and this is true; I’m creative with ideas, I’m resourceful, I’m a doer’, I enjoy being ‘on the go’. I don’t want any of these qualities to change, they are me, but I know I can’t continue to do them as I always have.
So here I am on a learning journey, working on slowing both my mind and my body down. And it isn’t easy to ‘just do’ especially living in the fast paced world of today of which we inhabit. But you know what? Why do we ‘have to’ set ourselves such demanding targets? Who wrote THAT rule book? (Answer: today’s society!) I strive to be happy and be healthy. I’m gonna scrap that old rulebook and write my own rule book! I’ll probably never finish it …
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